Friday, October 16, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Rhythm Relief
So many of us go through our lives getting so caught up on trivial things that we fail to recognize the struggle and misfortunate that afflicts those less fortunate.
On a Saturday afternoon on September 27, 2009, Typhoon Ondoy ravaged through Metro Manila in the Philippines, only taking six hours to pile a month's worth of rainfall onto the land. This accumulation eclipsed the previous record high from flooding in June 1967. Following this unfortunate occurrence, over 26 regions of the Philippines were submerged in water.
The impact left in the wake of the typhoon is undeniable, resulting in hundreds of deaths, injuries, and missing people. Hundreds of thousands of people have been affected by the damage done to their homes and neighborhoods.
Many of us have friends and family that were directly affected by what happened, and even though we are on the other side of the globe from the epicenter of destruction, that does not mean that there's nothing we can do.
For this reason, I invite you all to an event we have put together as quickly and thoroughly as possible. Donation boxes will be set up at various spots throughout the venue, with all proceeds will be going to Gawad Kalinga's Ondoy Relief & Rehab project.
Gifted, PlayNice, and Guerrilla::Words present:
Rhythm Relief:
A Musical Showcase Benefitting the Victims of Typhoon Ondoy
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Grand Banks
75 Montgomery Street (Corner of Washington Street)
Jersey City, NJ
Performances by:
Gifted
Jay Legaspi
Ron Verbal
Giselle Sera Josef
Hosted by:
Encite
In addition to donating money we will also be conducting a clothing drive, a collaborative effort with Jose from the Secret Service camp. Any old or unwanted clothing will be graciously accepted the night of the event, so while you are all cleaning out your closets and facilitating the transition to the Autumn/Winter wardrobe, you can take all the unwanted items you no longer need that are taking up valuable closet space and donate them.
For those of you busy or unavailable the night of the 24th but have clothing or any other donation that you would like to contribute, don't hesitate to contact us and we will be glad to pick it up.
Sorry people, this is a 21+ event.
On a Saturday afternoon on September 27, 2009, Typhoon Ondoy ravaged through Metro Manila in the Philippines, only taking six hours to pile a month's worth of rainfall onto the land. This accumulation eclipsed the previous record high from flooding in June 1967. Following this unfortunate occurrence, over 26 regions of the Philippines were submerged in water.
The impact left in the wake of the typhoon is undeniable, resulting in hundreds of deaths, injuries, and missing people. Hundreds of thousands of people have been affected by the damage done to their homes and neighborhoods.
Many of us have friends and family that were directly affected by what happened, and even though we are on the other side of the globe from the epicenter of destruction, that does not mean that there's nothing we can do.
For this reason, I invite you all to an event we have put together as quickly and thoroughly as possible. Donation boxes will be set up at various spots throughout the venue, with all proceeds will be going to Gawad Kalinga's Ondoy Relief & Rehab project.
Gifted, PlayNice, and Guerrilla::Words present:
Rhythm Relief:
A Musical Showcase Benefitting the Victims of Typhoon Ondoy
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Grand Banks
75 Montgomery Street (Corner of Washington Street)
Jersey City, NJ
Performances by:
Gifted
Jay Legaspi
Ron Verbal
Giselle Sera Josef
Hosted by:
Encite
In addition to donating money we will also be conducting a clothing drive, a collaborative effort with Jose from the Secret Service camp. Any old or unwanted clothing will be graciously accepted the night of the event, so while you are all cleaning out your closets and facilitating the transition to the Autumn/Winter wardrobe, you can take all the unwanted items you no longer need that are taking up valuable closet space and donate them.
For those of you busy or unavailable the night of the 24th but have clothing or any other donation that you would like to contribute, don't hesitate to contact us and we will be glad to pick it up.
Sorry people, this is a 21+ event.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
"Yo Side Of The Bed"
"Every time she leaves it's my heart that she's takin from me
I dunno if she's gone for good or returnin in the mornin
cannot wait through the night cause I keep tossin and turnin
I want you to know that our bed, our sheets, our pillows get lonely
on...yo side of the bed...
...I just wanna breath your air
watch you when you're wrappin up your hair
gazin at the mirrors up there, I'm reachin while imaginin that you're there
awake through the night cause I can't help the tossin and turnin
I want you to know that our bed, our sheets, our pillows get lonely
on...you side of the bed...
...I don't wanna sleep if you ain't here..."
- Trey Songz
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Turning The Page
and so a certain chapter in my life that has encompassed a span of almost 3 years has come to an end.
in the words of the greatest boxing trainer of all time:
"You can say what you want and act how you want, but what you do in the end is what you meant all along." - Cus D'Amato
i am doing music again, by the way.
more details to come.
in the words of the greatest boxing trainer of all time:
"You can say what you want and act how you want, but what you do in the end is what you meant all along." - Cus D'Amato
i am doing music again, by the way.
more details to come.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Classic Words Of Comfort
"We may not have attended grammar or high school together but we entered like this grown-up world together during our coming of age years at Rutgers or should I say Robeson Hall, and we probably felt alone even with a crowd but somewhere we found ourselves, our calling, and when a relic from the past is a familiar face/figure in our present moment to make it in our scary late 20's, it's comforting to know we really aren't alone and there are still people there from our "familiar place" who are real, and our late 20's aren't so scary after all... It's just life and without that person you have a good time with, whether platonic or not, it's like being alone on a crowded sidewalk - you're surrounded by many, yet feel like you're the only one standing there."
most heartfelt message i've gotten in the past decade.
most heartfelt message i've gotten in the past decade.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Bridges Have Been Burned
I got that fire in my eye and that pep in my step.
Rediscovered that swag that I lacked in previous go-rounds.
This next track is for y'all: the snakes, the fakers, the mediocre, the posers, the replicas, and the duplicates.
Rediscovered that swag that I lacked in previous go-rounds.
This next track is for y'all: the snakes, the fakers, the mediocre, the posers, the replicas, and the duplicates.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
On The Cusp
i remember when i started my radiography program, graduation seemed like it was an eternity away. after finishing all of my remaining clinical evaluations earlier today the reality of how close i am to graduating and working has finally hit me. i have never been happier.
Christ Hospital School Of Radiography Program:
1) 24 months of school: 2.5 months remaining
2)325 total didactic exams
3)36 mandatory initial clinical competency evaluations
4)15 elective initial clinical competency evaluations 17 completed
5)5 mandatory continual clinical competency evaluations 7 completed
6)5 mandatory terminal clinical competency evaluations 5 completed
as you can see, not only have i fulfilled all of my requirements, but i have gone above and beyond what was required. all that i have left to do now is just show up every day until september.
09/10/07 - first day of the program
09/11/08 - first day of senior year
09/04/09 - exit day (final day of clinicals)
09/09/09 - graduation day!
be there! i am closer than ever.
Christ Hospital School Of Radiography Program:
1) 24 months of school: 2.5 months remaining
2)
3)
4)
5)
6)
as you can see, not only have i fulfilled all of my requirements, but i have gone above and beyond what was required. all that i have left to do now is just show up every day until september.
09/10/07 - first day of the program
09/11/08 - first day of senior year
09/04/09 - exit day (final day of clinicals)
09/09/09 - graduation day!
be there! i am closer than ever.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
The Missing In Action Mixtape
for those of you that don't know, i have been secretly working on a mixtape completely produced by my man sterio.
what was originally conceived to be my solo album, has changed direction and has been dubbed a "mixtape", simply because of the fact that i decided that i will distribute it for free. my reason for doing so is because i feel like i waited far too long (primarily because of life and school) to put out my solo project, so in order to break out of irrelevance, i wanted to put out a mixtape for free so i could reestablish my presence.
the title came as a result of me being away for far too long. the tentative track listing (keyword "tentative") goes as follows:
Gifted & Sterio Present: The Missing In Action Mixtape
1) Leave Of Absence
2) Never Too Late
3) Hands Up
4) My Love
5) The Rise
6) Life's Still Beautiful
7) Movin' Up
8) The Next Chapter
9) Days Get Brighter
10) Drunk Again
11) Top Of The Ladder
12) Last Stop
the guest-appearances and cameos will remain secret until the mixtape is completed.
what was originally conceived to be my solo album, has changed direction and has been dubbed a "mixtape", simply because of the fact that i decided that i will distribute it for free. my reason for doing so is because i feel like i waited far too long (primarily because of life and school) to put out my solo project, so in order to break out of irrelevance, i wanted to put out a mixtape for free so i could reestablish my presence.
the title came as a result of me being away for far too long. the tentative track listing (keyword "tentative") goes as follows:
Gifted & Sterio Present: The Missing In Action Mixtape
1) Leave Of Absence
2) Never Too Late
3) Hands Up
4) My Love
5) The Rise
6) Life's Still Beautiful
7) Movin' Up
8) The Next Chapter
9) Days Get Brighter
10) Drunk Again
11) Top Of The Ladder
12) Last Stop
the guest-appearances and cameos will remain secret until the mixtape is completed.
Monday, June 15, 2009
DON'T DO IT!
do not, and i repeat DO NOT, under any circumstances, watch this film:
i actually did watch it out of curiosity quite some time ago, and it still disturbs the shit out of me to this day.
i actually did watch it out of curiosity quite some time ago, and it still disturbs the shit out of me to this day.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Rockbottom
Is anybody out there?
Is anybody listenin?
I feel like I'm alone in this world that I'm livin in.
Years ago, I hit rockbottom.
I wasn't in school, was stuck in the same dead end job that I'd had for years, had no idea what I wanted to do with myself or my future, and allowed the stress and drama from a woman drain me emotionally and mentally. The only positive thing that remained in my life at the time was baseball. I was in a league, and played with friends as well, so every day I was playing somewhere.
Shortly thereafter, I suffered the ankle fracture that came at the worst possible time, thus taking away my livelihood.
I didn't leave my house, didn't talk to anyone, and didn't do anything but sit around, watch tv, and drink. I had begun to relapse and exhibit self-destructive behavior that I was partial to in my younger years, but I didn't seem to give a single fuck about doing so. I let myself wallow in self-pity and my only solution was to drown it in alcohol.
Soon enough, the alcohol just wasn't cutting it, as I would remember again what kind of a mess I was as soon as sobriety hit. The prescription Percocet that I was issued became my new go-to "forget it all" tool. I learned through trial and error that two percocets washed down by a glass of Hennessey was the perfect dose for me to go into la-la land, where all of my stresses and worries were irrelevant.
As my body grew more tolerant to the poisons I was exposing it to, the doses slowly increased.
Rockbottom.
I remember the night vividly.
I was out of cigarettes, and had just finished off another "cocktail", which by this time was probably somewhere in the ratio of 3 percocets and 2 glasses of Hennessey, and decided I would crutch myself out to my car and take a drive to get a new pack.
Everything that occurred after that was a blur.
I regained my cognizance many hours later in my own bed, reeking of a pungent combination of the scents of alcohol, vomit, and nicotine. The odor alone was unpleasant. I opened my eyes, and laid there for a few minutes, completely unaware of what had transpired in the past few hours.
Over the course of my years, I have been blessed to have come across, befriend, and date a myriad of people. I pride myself on my ability to hold a conversation about anything with anyone.
But in that moment, laying in bed with a vomit-stained shirt, a cast-covered foot, and a broken spirit, I had never felt more alone.
I had no one to turn to. I couldn't possibly let any of my friends know what was going on in my head. I was too preoccupied with maintaining my tough image, and I was also very embarrassed at what I was doing to myself.
I thought of any and everything you could imagine as I laid there, physically motionless but mentally moving a mile a minute. I knew I had hit a crossroad. I could not continue living my life as I was. I even had a conversation with a deceased friend in my head as I laid there. I knew that I had to commit to going one direction or the other.
The shower I followed that up with was the most fulfilling and symbolic shower I'd ever taken up to that point. Aside from washing the disgustingness off of me, I felt it was symbolic of me washing away my vices. I shaved again (because of the months of injury-forced seclusion, I hadn't shaved my head or face at all), flushed away the rest of the Percocets, poured the Hennessey down the drain, and vowed to not let my demons get the best of me.
The next week I submitted my application for radiology school.
I haven't looked back since.
Keep this in mind - no matter how someone portrays themself to you, you never truly know what goes on in their head when they're alone.
Is anybody listenin?
I feel like I'm alone in this world that I'm livin in.
Years ago, I hit rockbottom.
I wasn't in school, was stuck in the same dead end job that I'd had for years, had no idea what I wanted to do with myself or my future, and allowed the stress and drama from a woman drain me emotionally and mentally. The only positive thing that remained in my life at the time was baseball. I was in a league, and played with friends as well, so every day I was playing somewhere.
Shortly thereafter, I suffered the ankle fracture that came at the worst possible time, thus taking away my livelihood.
I didn't leave my house, didn't talk to anyone, and didn't do anything but sit around, watch tv, and drink. I had begun to relapse and exhibit self-destructive behavior that I was partial to in my younger years, but I didn't seem to give a single fuck about doing so. I let myself wallow in self-pity and my only solution was to drown it in alcohol.
Soon enough, the alcohol just wasn't cutting it, as I would remember again what kind of a mess I was as soon as sobriety hit. The prescription Percocet that I was issued became my new go-to "forget it all" tool. I learned through trial and error that two percocets washed down by a glass of Hennessey was the perfect dose for me to go into la-la land, where all of my stresses and worries were irrelevant.
As my body grew more tolerant to the poisons I was exposing it to, the doses slowly increased.
Rockbottom.
I remember the night vividly.
I was out of cigarettes, and had just finished off another "cocktail", which by this time was probably somewhere in the ratio of 3 percocets and 2 glasses of Hennessey, and decided I would crutch myself out to my car and take a drive to get a new pack.
Everything that occurred after that was a blur.
I regained my cognizance many hours later in my own bed, reeking of a pungent combination of the scents of alcohol, vomit, and nicotine. The odor alone was unpleasant. I opened my eyes, and laid there for a few minutes, completely unaware of what had transpired in the past few hours.
Over the course of my years, I have been blessed to have come across, befriend, and date a myriad of people. I pride myself on my ability to hold a conversation about anything with anyone.
But in that moment, laying in bed with a vomit-stained shirt, a cast-covered foot, and a broken spirit, I had never felt more alone.
I had no one to turn to. I couldn't possibly let any of my friends know what was going on in my head. I was too preoccupied with maintaining my tough image, and I was also very embarrassed at what I was doing to myself.
I thought of any and everything you could imagine as I laid there, physically motionless but mentally moving a mile a minute. I knew I had hit a crossroad. I could not continue living my life as I was. I even had a conversation with a deceased friend in my head as I laid there. I knew that I had to commit to going one direction or the other.
The shower I followed that up with was the most fulfilling and symbolic shower I'd ever taken up to that point. Aside from washing the disgustingness off of me, I felt it was symbolic of me washing away my vices. I shaved again (because of the months of injury-forced seclusion, I hadn't shaved my head or face at all), flushed away the rest of the Percocets, poured the Hennessey down the drain, and vowed to not let my demons get the best of me.
The next week I submitted my application for radiology school.
I haven't looked back since.
Keep this in mind - no matter how someone portrays themself to you, you never truly know what goes on in their head when they're alone.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
The Sun Still Shines...
@ work, where I seem to waste my life away. Looking forward though to a great night with an awesome person.
Harbor Casino open bar tonight from 11-1 for $20. Come out and support. We'll be there!
Harbor Casino open bar tonight from 11-1 for $20. Come out and support. We'll be there!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Fuck You, Lucy
i love this shit. this song fully encapsulates the overwhelming blast of emotions that one goes through when in the post-breakup mindset.
Fuck You Lucy - Atmosphere
"she say that she still wants a friendship
she can't live a life without me as a friend
i can't figure out why i give a damn to what she wants
i don't understand the now before the then
most of this garbage i write that these people seem to like
is about you and how i let you infect my life
and if they got to know you, i doubt that they would see it
they'd wonder what i showed you, how you could leave it
a friend in chicago said that i should stay persistent
if i stay around, i'm bound to break resistance
fuck you lucy, for defining my existence
fuck you and your differences
ever since i was a young lad with a part-time dad
it was hard to find happiness inside of what i had
i studied my mother, i digested her pain
and vowed no women on my path would have to walk the same
travel like sound across the fate ladder
i travel with spoon to mix this cake batter
and i travel with feel, so i can deal with touch
it's like that, thank you very much, fuck you very much
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
fuck the 'what happened?', i got stuck
they can peel pieces of me off the grill of her truck
used to walk with luck, used to hold her hand
fell behind and played the role of a slower man
i wanna stand on top of this mountain and yell
i wanna wake up and break up this lake of hell
i feel like a bitch for lettin the sheet twist me up
the last starfighter was wounded, time to give it up
on a pick it up mission, kept it bitter
gettin in a million memories just to forget her
the difficulty in keepin emotions controlled
cookies for the road, took me by the soul
hunger for the drama, hunger for the nurture
gonna take it further, the hurt feels like murder
interpret the eyes, read the lines on her face
the sunshine is fake, how much time did i waste?
fuck you lucy, for leavin me
fuck you lucy, for not needin me
i wanna say fuck you, because i still love you
no i'm not okay, and i don't know what to do
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
do i sound mad? well i guess i'm a little pissed
every action has a point, five points make a fist
you close 'em, you swing 'em, it hurts when it hits
and the truth can be a bitch, but if the boot fits
i got an idea, you should get a tattoo that says 'warning'
that's all, just a warning
so the potential victim can take a left and save breath
and avoid you, sober and upset in the morning
i wanna scream 'fuck you lucy!'
but the problem is i love you lucy
so instead, i'ma finish my drink and have another
while you think about how you used to be my lover
Fuck You Lucy - Atmosphere
"she say that she still wants a friendship
she can't live a life without me as a friend
i can't figure out why i give a damn to what she wants
i don't understand the now before the then
most of this garbage i write that these people seem to like
is about you and how i let you infect my life
and if they got to know you, i doubt that they would see it
they'd wonder what i showed you, how you could leave it
a friend in chicago said that i should stay persistent
if i stay around, i'm bound to break resistance
fuck you lucy, for defining my existence
fuck you and your differences
ever since i was a young lad with a part-time dad
it was hard to find happiness inside of what i had
i studied my mother, i digested her pain
and vowed no women on my path would have to walk the same
travel like sound across the fate ladder
i travel with spoon to mix this cake batter
and i travel with feel, so i can deal with touch
it's like that, thank you very much, fuck you very much
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
fuck the 'what happened?', i got stuck
they can peel pieces of me off the grill of her truck
used to walk with luck, used to hold her hand
fell behind and played the role of a slower man
i wanna stand on top of this mountain and yell
i wanna wake up and break up this lake of hell
i feel like a bitch for lettin the sheet twist me up
the last starfighter was wounded, time to give it up
on a pick it up mission, kept it bitter
gettin in a million memories just to forget her
the difficulty in keepin emotions controlled
cookies for the road, took me by the soul
hunger for the drama, hunger for the nurture
gonna take it further, the hurt feels like murder
interpret the eyes, read the lines on her face
the sunshine is fake, how much time did i waste?
fuck you lucy, for leavin me
fuck you lucy, for not needin me
i wanna say fuck you, because i still love you
no i'm not okay, and i don't know what to do
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
and everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
everyone in his life would mistake it as love
do i sound mad? well i guess i'm a little pissed
every action has a point, five points make a fist
you close 'em, you swing 'em, it hurts when it hits
and the truth can be a bitch, but if the boot fits
i got an idea, you should get a tattoo that says 'warning'
that's all, just a warning
so the potential victim can take a left and save breath
and avoid you, sober and upset in the morning
i wanna scream 'fuck you lucy!'
but the problem is i love you lucy
so instead, i'ma finish my drink and have another
while you think about how you used to be my lover
Monday, April 20, 2009
The Internal Debate.
Stay or go?
It's the question I most often ask myself.
A myriad of positives and negatives exist for both sides of the debate.
I should stay.
Staying around is where I feel comfortable.
I can't get what I truly want unless I'm willing to stay.
At this exact moment in time, staying is what would make me happy.
Scratch that, staying and attaining what I desire by staying is what would make me happy.
I have a lot of work to do in terms of persuading, convincing, and proving.
There is no guarantee however, that if I do stay, that things will work out how I wish they would.
My heart is telling me to stay.
I can't stay if things don't change.
I should leave.
Leaving is where I could pursue other options that I never fathomed to be possible.
I can discover new opportunities and endure new experiences if I leave.
At this exact moment in time, the uncertainty of what would happen if I left is exhilarating.
Scratch that, leaving and knowing that maybe a better tomorrow is out there is exhilarating.
I have a lot of preparations to make to ensure I am ready and able to leave.
There is no guarantee however, that if I do leave, that it will lead to prosperity and success.
My heart is telling me to leave.
I can't leave if things stay the same.
Every time I weigh out the pros and cons of each, I find the scale to be evenly balanced.
I think I've found a question to which there really is no correct answer.
Stay or go?
It's the question I most often ask myself.
A myriad of positives and negatives exist for both sides of the debate.
I should stay.
Staying around is where I feel comfortable.
I can't get what I truly want unless I'm willing to stay.
At this exact moment in time, staying is what would make me happy.
Scratch that, staying and attaining what I desire by staying is what would make me happy.
I have a lot of work to do in terms of persuading, convincing, and proving.
There is no guarantee however, that if I do stay, that things will work out how I wish they would.
My heart is telling me to stay.
I can't stay if things don't change.
I should leave.
Leaving is where I could pursue other options that I never fathomed to be possible.
I can discover new opportunities and endure new experiences if I leave.
At this exact moment in time, the uncertainty of what would happen if I left is exhilarating.
Scratch that, leaving and knowing that maybe a better tomorrow is out there is exhilarating.
I have a lot of preparations to make to ensure I am ready and able to leave.
There is no guarantee however, that if I do leave, that it will lead to prosperity and success.
My heart is telling me to leave.
I can't leave if things stay the same.
Every time I weigh out the pros and cons of each, I find the scale to be evenly balanced.
I think I've found a question to which there really is no correct answer.
Stay or go?
Friday, April 10, 2009
Control + Alt + Delete
I have gone back to square one after resetting everything. Sometimes it takes more courage to accept defeat, dust your shoulders off, and move on than it does to keep fighting a losing battle.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
No Gaaaaayyyeeeeeaayyyyayyyymeeeessss
i have been unsuccessful thus far in my attempts to stop singing this song to myself:
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